4 a.m. musings on 65
In three days I walk over a threshold. I will be 65.
There are so many cool things about being this age.
Like, I no longer fuss over how I look as I always have. I wear the exact same outfit every day. That is, I own 6 of the same white cardigan sweaters, 9 of the same black camisoles and 3 each of 2 different skirts. I don’t brush my hair. I often forget to put on socks and shoes regardless of the season and yes…you will see my barefoot marks in the snow. And no…I don’t flinch from the cold, as I don’t seem to feel much of anything but refreshed by it as I remember there aren’t shoes between me and the snow.
Funny thing is, I save a lot of time by not having to think about what I am going to wear or how I look. I now get to think about what the day wants me to be.
My entire life I have been almost impossibly optimistic and forward-thinking. These days I find myself ferociously committed to this optimism. I understand there are endless reasons not to be positive…I’m not naive or ignoring the state of the world’s affairs. Indeed, it’s because of this that I figure I must move forward with not just optimism, but love and kindness. Regardless of how my day may be going. Every. Single.Day.
It’s a spiritual practice for me. Because I work with young families who are investing in the future and bumping into Life on a daily basis. As a midwife I have the opportunity every single day with every single family to hold their Hope in my space for one hour of their life. To hear their dreams and fears and worries and self-doubt and self-criticism.
I have lived long and chosen well, which now grants me credibility as I try to offer them the perspective of time and self-love and acceptance. In return, my beloved families allow me to share in their joy at the sound of their baby’s heartbeat and the feel of a not-yet-born baby’s kick as I feel their belly-home during a belly check.
And I get to smile. A lot.
This is my version of health CARE.
Please support this model of health CARE by donating to the GoFundMe set up to support my birth center.
Support the future of love.
I thank you from the bottom of my heart,
Katherine
